Lately Mike, a Pastor, had grown weary from the demands of his growing church. He was getting very little sleep and a couple of deacons had really been putting him to the test.
So, one beautiful Spring Sunday morning he decides that he would feel better with a relaxing round of golf. Pretending to be sick, he calls the deacons and informs them that he is sick and will not be able to make it that day. He scheduled in a guest speaker so everything was under control without him.
As Pastor Mike was preparing to tee off on the first hole, the Archangel Michael looked over at the Father and said, "I'm sorry, sir, but what are you going to do? Pastor Mike called in to his deacons and said he was sick. He lied to them and to the church. And, he is skipping church all together. Shouldn't you punish him somehow for his behavior?"
"Sure," said the Father. "I'm going to make him hit a hole-in-one on every hole."
"A hole-in-one on every hole?!" said Michael. "That's not punishment. That's a blessing. No one has ever done that and you're going to help this lazy, lying pastor score a hole-in-one on every hole? How is that punishment?!"
"Who's he gonna tell?"
Saturday, June 21, 2008
Sunday, June 15, 2008
A Dad Funny
TOP 10 WRONG WAYS TO INITIATE YOUR SON INTO MANHOOD
10. Teach him the secret male ritual of leaving the toilet seat up and the toilet paper roll empty.
9. Have a ceremony where you give him his own remote control.
8. Lead him through an afternoon of rigorous physical training in the back yard while you sit in a lawn chair with a half-gallon of ice cream.
7. Eat until you're about to burst and then ride the Screamin' Hurler roller coaster.
6. Put cream on his face and let the cat shave him with its tongue.
5. Walk behind him through his school halls yelling, "You da man!"
4. Send him to the local discount store to buy mom's "personal things."
3. Give him Grandma's lime green Gremlin with personalized license plates that say, "TUFFGUY."
2. Send the womenfolk shopping, then get out your secret Old Yeller video and have a good cry together.
1. Shot put catching.
today'sTHOT============================
Children are natural mimics - they act like us in spite of all our attempts to teach them good manners.
10. Teach him the secret male ritual of leaving the toilet seat up and the toilet paper roll empty.
9. Have a ceremony where you give him his own remote control.
8. Lead him through an afternoon of rigorous physical training in the back yard while you sit in a lawn chair with a half-gallon of ice cream.
7. Eat until you're about to burst and then ride the Screamin' Hurler roller coaster.
6. Put cream on his face and let the cat shave him with its tongue.
5. Walk behind him through his school halls yelling, "You da man!"
4. Send him to the local discount store to buy mom's "personal things."
3. Give him Grandma's lime green Gremlin with personalized license plates that say, "TUFFGUY."
2. Send the womenfolk shopping, then get out your secret Old Yeller video and have a good cry together.
1. Shot put catching.
today'sTHOT============================
Children are natural mimics - they act like us in spite of all our attempts to teach them good manners.
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